Let's have an honest chat

It isn't a huge secret that I have lost weight over the last few years. Anyone with access to my Facebook photos can see this change that has occurred. I am not about to discuss the "how" to lose weight. There are MANY varied options and I couldn't tell you what the right choice is for you and your situation. Heck, it is hard for me to find the right path for myself. This drawn out thought is more about what happens after the weight loss.

With the new year comes many, many, many commercials prompting people to lose weight. These commercials promise you a whole new life, happiness, joy, and sex appeal. They are trying to make money off you. Keep that in mind. I will happily share with you what things have changed about my life with weight loss vs. what has stayed exactly the same.

What has stayed the same:

1. My happiness level. I was content before and I am content now. Losing weight will not fix all that is wrong with your life. 
2. How much I love myself. I never was filled with self-hared when I was fat. If you hate yourself when fat, you will still hate yourself even as you lose weight. Find a way to love yourself regardless of what size you are.
3. My romantic life. Have a partner who ridicules you about your size? It isn't you, it is them. They will still be a jerk after you lose weight. My husband has loved me and been attracted to me when I was 130lbs up to 256lbs and back down again. Our relationship has not changed. Well, I guess with the exception that I am often trying to force him to go for a run with me now.
4. My energy level. I know I am supposed to say that I have so much more energy, but I have always had quite a bit of kick in my step. I haven't really noticed it change. It isn't as if I was some lazy slug before and suddenly now I am taking on the world. I have been taking on the world since 1980 :)
5. My attractiveness. Haha! Ok, I know this is in the eye of the beholder, but please, I was a hot piece back then and I still am ;)  (see what I am saying? I have been full of myself regardless of size)
6. I still have arthritis in my joints. Sure, they feel a bit better with less of me to support, but my knees and hands are still achey and stiff each cold morning. 
7. Who I am. I am not a "whole new me" or anything like that. I am just the same old me. I really don't feel that my personality has changed at all. People's perceptions of me may have changed, but who I am putting out there is really quite the same.

What has changed:

1. I look worse naked. No, really. Lose 130+lbs and you will see what I mean. It isn't pretty. I need to wear Spanx more now then I did back when I was heavy. Skin galore. I am saving up for a tummy tuck and breast lift. If you saw me naked, I promise you would kick $100 into my savings fund. I don't hate my body, but I am just sharing with you that Megan Fox was not hiding under the adipose tissue.
2. My cholesterol levels! Hells yeah! I have normal cholesterol levels, which is THRILLING to me. I get giddy whenever I get my levels checked now. Joe told me it would be an overkill to frame my blood work. I am also not pre-diabetic now :)
3. My ability to do physical activities. I have become more physically fit, but that isn't just magic weight loss, that is also being active and building my activity level. I never was ashamed of my weight or let it stop me from going swimming or whatever, but it is much easier to now go running, hiking, etc. I can also easily do things like go sledding with my kids. This won't be different for everyone, though! There are heavy people who can run marathons, people! 
4. How I eat and how I watch the scale. I have to eat very differently now and I have to watch myself like a hawk. In my mind, I really had imagined that once I hit my goal weight, that I would be able to just live easily without ever having to worry about the scale again. That is exactly the opposite of true. Maintaining my weight is HARD. If I don't weigh myself daily then I start to creep up a bit. Every time my weight begins to creep, then I have to start all over again with logging and weighing every bite of everything I consume to see where my problem foods are so I can cut them out. 
5. How strangers treat me. It is bizarre, but strangers tend to be nicer to me now. And it isn't because I am suddenly a more outgoing person or smiling more or whatever. It is, I believe, because we live in a fat-phobic society. Now, people open doors for me (Joe tells me that move is all about trying to look at the person's behind, but it happens even when I am wearing a winter parka). It is weird and still taking some getting used to. And it makes me a bit angry. I was a worthy person before. I am not suddenly more worthy of kindness just because I am smaller.
6. Clothes are cheaper. Shopping is not actually more fun though because, with all the extra skin, clothes tend to fit weird. Still, I am happy to not be giving 1/2 my annual income to Lane Bryant anymore. $14.50 for knickers.... Lane Bryant, you should be ashamed.

I guess the take away message that I want people to have is that you should love yourself regardless of your size. Losing weight is not some magic cure-all to all that is wrong with your life. Chase your health rather than a certain jean size. Don't let those stupid commercials and infomercials make you feel like you are any less than amazing.